I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
