My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Randomize
