the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Come on in and take your pants off
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