Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so explain again why im purple
no
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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