He is an equal opportunity slut.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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