his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch