The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
