but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
this hospital has no fireball
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
