I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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