I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize