just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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