Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
