scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
