Non-Jews are for practice
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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