I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
