So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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