Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
