she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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