he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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