I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
