I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
