So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
