We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize