I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize