So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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