Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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