I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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