so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
