If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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