I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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