Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
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