so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
