What a fucking waste of an outfit
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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