I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
