the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
