She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm