hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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