I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
