Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your signature on my underwear?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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