is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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