and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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