There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize