the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Randomize
