Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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