why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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