how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
