It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
this is an emotional support booty call
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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