Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
