I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
