Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
