I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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