Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
