And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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